Transformational Talk ... a column by Penelope Young Andrade

Penelope Young Andrade, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist, founder of the San Diego Center for Psychosynthesis, and founder of Transformational Talk Radio.


Twitter @EmotionalRx



Tired of Striving for Goals Not Reached?

January 01, 2017  -Penelope Y. Andrade


Are you tired of striving for goals not reached? The origin of ‘strive’ is a French word meaning strife. Striving actions are different from engaged actions as they often include a frisson of friction. If you’re working hard and not getting to goals, it may be time to look for inner discord that has turned your attempts at effective action into wearying strife.

Here’s the tip:  Envision your unmet goal. See yourself  ‘striving’ toward that goal. Take time to fully inhabit this image and notice how your body feels as you do this. See if you look happy or fulfilled. Breathe. Next, evaluate how much of your time is spent doing things you don’t really enjoy, but think you ‘should’ be doing to get someplace.

Now, imagine what your life would be like if you let go of striving. This doesn’t mean letting go of goals. Stopping striving means looking regularly for the path of least resistance. It means cooperating with what is moving toward you rather than chasing after people/places/things just out of reach. Letting go of striving means doing things because you love doing them…because they are enriching in and of themselves.

Finally, notice what happens in body/mind/heart/soul as you consider letting go of forcing yourself to do stuff you don’t like doing. Feel relief flooding (or trickling) in. Whew! Committing to doing only what you love and enjoy (as much as possible) opens doors for creativity, serendipity. Watch new goals emerge effortlessly from ease and alignment. Remember, there is no road to fulfillment, fulfillment is the road.


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