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Choice for Love: Entering into a New, Enlightened Relationship with Yourself, Others & the World

Choice for Love: Entering into a New, Enlightened Relationship with Yourself, Others & the World

by Barbara De Angelis


Sometime today, you turned on a faucet in your home or apartment, and water emerged. You used that water to cook, to take a shower, to wash your dishes, and for many other purposes.

You need that water. It allows you to experience more happiness, ease, and enjoyment in life.

How does water flow into your home? The water comes from an enormous original source and collects in a smaller reservoir assigned to your home. It’s carried into your house by an intricate set of pipes that then connect you with the water. Are the pipes the same as the water? “That’s a silly question!” you think. “Of course they’re not.” The pipes create the relationship between you and the water—they supply the water, but they are not the water.

This metaphor will help us answer our next important question:

If love is a vibrational field of divine energy, what’s the difference between love and a relationship?

Love is like the water of life. It’s a divine, limitless source that nourishes us and supports us in so many ways. We need it to survive. Each of us has our own personal reservoir of that love called “the heart.” Our heart is the place where we collect and access that water from the source.

When two people have a relationship, they’re each accessing that love from their own separate, individual heart reservoir. You have your own personal set of “pipes” that connects you to your love, and the other person has their pipes connecting them to their love.

All of the components of a relationship—affection, communication, shared activities, and so on—serve as vehicles for your love to flow out and interact with someone else’s love, kind of like two streams of energy interacting together. (Visualize two streams of water dancing and splashing.) But the source of that love is inside of you.

A relationship is not the same as love.

Love is a vibrational field of sublime, life-enhancing energy.

A relationship is a vehicle through which you can experience love.

Another person is also a vehicle through which you can experience love.

But they’re not the source of the love.

Love doesn’t come from the outside of your life in.

Love comes from the inside out.

So what is it that we’re feeling when we feel love?

What we call the “feeling” of love is the vibrational experience of the limitless field of cosmic energy as it moves into us and through us. That means any love we’re feeling is divine love!

Why is it that you feel more love in one moment than you do in another? Here’s the best way I know how to describe it:

Remember that you have your own individual reservoir of love—your heart. You can imagine your heart like your personal ocean filled with the energy of love.
1) Someone comes along—your mate, your child, your friend—and does something or says something that is sweet, kind, and caring.
2) Their loving energy is like the wind: it stirs your vibrational ocean of love energy to rise up in waves.
3) The stronger the wind of the other person’s vibrational energy, the bigger the waves of your own love that you feel rising up in your heart.

Isn’t this an illuminating way to understand what we mean by “love”? When you “feel” love, you’re actually experiencing the movement of that life force rising up within you, like a quiet ocean suddenly rising up in waves. The same amount of water is always there in the ocean, but when it moves into waves, it seems like something greater has happened, as if the ocean itself has become bigger. Love is always there within you, but sometimes it rises up in waves, and suddenly, you “feel” love.

So perhaps some new, enlightened translations of the phrase “I love you” are:

“My love is rising up in waves.” Or

“Your wind makes wonderful waves on the ocean of my heart!”

Once we gain this new, enlightened understanding of love and relationships, something else instantly becomes clear:

When we feel love, we’re never falling in love.

We’re always rising in love.



Barbara De Angelis

The following excerpt is taken from the book Choice for Love: Entering into a New, Enlightened Relationship with Yourself, Others & the World by Dr. Barbara De Angelis.

It is published by Hay House (Available Feb. 14, 2018)

Available at all bookstores or at:

For more info about Barabara De Angelis or her book, please visit

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